The last Amber of life.

Much due apologies are showered upon any entity visiting this page, specially the dear friends who tagged me.
1. I never normally show myself out. Not my weakness, not my strength, not my liking, not my disliking.
2.I like to watch things a lot. As in, before talking about the world, I feel we need to know about it, a lot more than we do.
3. I love watches.
4. I cannot live without addictions.
5. To me nothing in life can become mandatory.
6. each step is a lesson to me.
7. Most of the times, in my life, I feel I am not wrong.
8. I love sleeping on my own cot, in my own blanket.
9. I miss all my dear friends, due to my irregular habits and senseless obsessions.
10. I reduced blogging because I started believing that I am no good at writing.
11. I love travelling,drinking and more travelling.
12. I love snowy,cold,dark,winters .(The ones I have never seen.)
13. I cannot keep writing exams and attending interviews to get money.
14. At the moment, I have also lately started believeing that money is not mandatory.
15. I have a kinetic that carries me all around the world.
16. I go weak at the knees when something innocent is hurt.(goes generally for dogs, sometimes females)
17. I love to roam idle.
18. I love reading biographies, history books and other book books.
19. I cannot think of more than 18 points.
20.I wonder how I wrote the last two points.......
21. I love u all people, who keep trying to know about my life and keep in touch folks.......
Hey!!! where was I???? Right here....Where did my blog go? It never moved..It simply remained unmoved to changes I moved to.

I believe in unity at a much minute level.I do not believe that there are normal people.At the moment I cannot stop coughing.I am sick and down with cold, for the record. Today is the last day to submit a project and for heaven's sake, I have still not perfected the art of copying at a larger(higher) level.I am really shy when I shouldnt be, and when people do not want me to talk, I can keep blabbering. I love words and languages. I like to know more about everyone, how everyone moves in life, where people go, where people move away from, and why.

I am really boring and sentimental inside, but my artificial half which will remain switched on for my entire life is endlessly happy and content. I am too artificial for words. NO. I cannot lie. But, yes, I am artificial.
I mock a lot.The system, the people, their customs, their habits, everything. But, I believe that is a lighter part, that is necessary for life.

13,Hoka Resort,Nagwa

Are you sure??
Are you coming??
Of course, we are going..........arent we??(are we?)
The clock struck an angry 9'o clock and the night was in quite swiftly. The mild hum of distant garba music deranged the ears.Around half past nine, five desperate faces waving madly at anything that moves faster than the human legs, finally pushed a guy to stop his Safari...and that was how we met Ravi, who drove us straight to our destination's destination.

It was an amazing night and the bus was fabulous.Smoking in the bus and trying to hide it, was fun.
All in all an amazing trip with the beach in full splendour..and other good words..
I'll get back to myself and my blog later to write the full story-Diu.


To a person who has seen micro bits of a world spread over zillions of miles, anything novel just ends up as something fascinating. This bus was more a home than a bus. it had A-H,8 seats , two at a time, and two opposite...so, AB and CD,and behind them, were EF and GH. Next followed a long mirror, partitioning the bus into two and each half having four individual train-la, sleepers. These were followed by two small boxes at the rear, which upon opening showed themselves to be room enough for two.After GH, the rest of the seats were named in numbers and run till 25 something.We got G,H,17,22,23, I guess. G-H were more like seats in a theatre except for the small difference that the movie doesnt run in front of your eyes, but to your sides, both left and right. Complete with curtains, cushions, and a far away lighted back drop, the short night began.

Slowly, the smoke rose, kept rising and rising and then a brilliant idea struck a brilliant mind. Hiding the smoke inside an empty bottle ......Little things with those hidden half smiles that keep dragging the face and contorting it, but not of pain...but just a sly, sense of coziness and closeness with the people you are.

Come, stop two, and everyone got down, had some thing to munch, gathered some cigarettes and got back in time. Next stop, left only me down on the ground, awaiting the much longed for lingering sense of a different freshness that I was waiting for.

At around 9 in the morning, I guess, we finally were ordered to get down and leave the bus..."we are here DIU"...
"where do we stay?" "let's ask someone" "Where are the others?" "Hey!!come back...."
Lots of noises and silence followed a small talk with the nearest shop owner and we found that nagwa beach was a great place to stay. Off we went and got off at the beach.Never sure on what to do next, 5 crazy people stalked the sand.......But, the bags were calling for rest, and we strode to a couple of doors only to find them, carving bautifully another hole in the pocket. We were finally told that at the far bend, Hoka was a pleasant and silent and more importantly a pocket friendly stay. At Hoka...
"bhaiyya, room kitne mein milega?"
"750, A/C room, 150 per person for extra persons"
I still wonder what happened next..coz the price got down to 650 for all....in a room, beside which "a few disturbing noises " shall go on the whole day...Did we care? do we? Will we ever??

And so we landed, in room no.13, Resort Hoka.

The few minutes that took for getting through with the late morning ablutions were quickly compensated for, with the active environment at the hotel, with a hammock,trees and novels.Out we went and straight back to the beach.Careful to sneer at every hotel we encountered on the way. And off went the first quarter, down three throats. The waves were calling and the heat together with the alcohol made us go straight in. An economical meal followed by more alcohol and the heat soon gathered up some more courage and alcohol with that. Off we went, back to the room, to rest, to sweat, to forget the ambience for a moment, to find solitary pleasure in refining delights by regressing on them. A quarter of white rum accompanied us from the hotel right down the mouth. Just three again.... . Night called us out of our lairs and the sun had already set on diu and also on one of us. The rest tried to make sense of the unending beach with an array of randomly strewn stones, with each wave carving them into a more jagged, vicious formation. I slowly left the company of the rest.I wandered into the water, reached the bottom of the sea. A sea that had mysteries open to each viewer, but viewers, had their eyes closed, away from the sea. The horizon is always horizontal here, no matter how far you try ....I travelled, travelled faster than the dolphins inside, travelled in a way that made everything light up. Every inch, each piece of the unknown unfolded in a way that one could not describe as legitimate.The scanty strokes of moonlight whipped the waves to pursue their path towards the shore. But the waves, never agreed...And so, it goes on..
How significant was the sea to me? and how significant was I to the sea? I kept looking into it the whole day, thw whole time, but it never replied with anything more than its dull thud of the water caressing the soft sand and weathering rocks.A quarter of white rum ended the night, was what we thought. But, we were in for more....A lot more

The 9 nights of fiery passion

This is perhaps, or rather, hopefully, my last navratri in gujarat. The land of sweet,blossomed,slender waist beauties gyrating to the psychedelic music and the swaying lights. You look intricately into one and you see yourself,the mirrors, it is. To leave behind something is not easy. You keep looking behind as to whether you really need to throw it away. And soon, a trail of things that are left might be made leading to ....me.The ultra-thin threads holding their cholis in place provide a great sense of erotic satisfaction for the undeserved, for the people who were never asked to dance with anyone, for the people who never could ask anyone to dance, for the people who were rejected and for the people.....who remain, but 'a person'. I, as a person, or rather me, having developed exponentially over the last few weeks, should start by thanking not soulmates nor blind dates, but rather ....room mates. A cold morbid atmosphere stings you to do what you deserve and do what you desire. The shocking nudity of burning figures makes you jump into the fire and dance in a frenzy.

Swooning to the tunes of a drone,
Brightness everywhere, and the moon never shone,
people were persons no more,
Together they made one more.
Pleasure never remained intimate,
but rather reminded of movements not late.

To see, is to perceive.And to perceive, is to make a decision on what you see. And this, is what not all make out of things. Preconceived notions of things that look good and things that look bad are making the ways of the world worse. And to add to that, there are always the reliable cheerleaders ready to gore at the strikingly ugly unwordly things....or , unworthy things,....

As I strode out of the hostel, towards the lab, a sudden piece of quivering slime caught my attention. Over 5 feet long, and ultra oily and dark, it slowly made its way up a small half-tree. It took me a while to realize that such proximity might be my capability to gamble with foolishness of an extreme degree and so taking a few steps ahead, I looked at the tree and tried to think of what could happen next...Over 3 different types of bird species lived over there. And all birds of all types were screeching hard to divert attention and get some help. It kept moving and moving, reminding me of those professional thieves, who know when someone is helpless. Its slow pace, but determined and sly body slowly reached the top and soon, the first nest.The spouses realized that there was only one way left...All the hatched chicks were thrown down on the ground, one by one...First came a stout, little bird ...Down it fell from over 11feet and it never left the ground..A second one, a bit luckier, limped its way back into a nearby bush.....It was a massive destructive massacre for the winged creatures and to the snake, a nutritious meal....Weird are the ways of nature, that chooses to keep some helpless and some, with choices of food that vary from them......to ...me.

Retake: take 1

It's something lingering in my head since a long time and I keep thinking of it and laugh my head off just in the middle of something...To be precise, I do not remember who told me this and when, but somehow it just keeps coming back to me ....

Hokay....I need to start this just like another kindergarden book. There was a guy called Krishna...And apparently, there family was the..ohh-soooo-cooool-type, and so, he was popularly called Krissshh. Now, Kris was about 16 and he had a kid brother of about two years. The first thing of which parents can be happy when their little kid starts walking is that they may no more need to clean up his bed everytime he poops up or pees coz he can start peeing in the toilet. So, it is toilet training time. And this kid was taken to the toilet, made to stand there and then, the parents realized that when someone pees, the ssssssshhhhhh sound might just give him a signal to let out his pressure..And so, one of the parents stands behind him and says shhhhhhh at regular intervals of time and they discovered that it worked. And when Krisssshhhh came home, and his mom calls"Krissshhh, Have some food", and walks over to the table to serve food, only to realize a pool of yellow liquid and the kid near the table and everytime poor dear Krisshh was called, the soudn ssshhh was just to much to resist and out came pee from the little kid...

Maybe, I am not so good at narrating, but this thing just ticks me off ...Anytime

Indeed,....

Here's a sample head I was trying to read...
"Study, study,study,......"
"Learn everything worth every penny spent in college"
"reach new realms of knowledge"
"Study,Study,Study......"
thus went the peaceful life of just another nobody for somebody like me until....
Someone changed it and changed it.......Well...A bit noticeably..
"Keep the door closed.Do not fight..."
"try to sleep in light......."
"try to adjust to the sound and noise"
"try to live... "
I must confess that I am not cruel nor do I intend to be, but at times maybe, I happen to be just a wee bit on the wrong side of humanity. And so, the hummer tries to lead a life..

Lets see what I can write about, considering my small I.Q and my smaller interest in current affairs. Most people have things like GRE and CAT to live upto, and so I need to write about something, that will give me, well....lasting satisfaction....
Hmm....lessee...How about the new blonde hair with cheetah streaks...no wonder there is so much awareness about the endagered leapords nowadays..
Or how about this fact...Apparently, one guy uses up 278 litres on an average daily..
this itself proves how unique I am ....See ..no bath, saving a 100 litres, occasional brushing -save a litre, lots of drinks, save another litre, and much more....
How about the current mode of interest of a student in a subject?And how about the mindset of a troubled professor??
You check something on the intranet to find that you have 100 odd students in your course and you get ready with a long bath and a fresh deo, smartly pressed clothes, and neatly combed hair, with a gel that smells good too, and to add to that, you might even have a small beard hiding your throat from public display. Anyway, you walk up to the class assuming that it must be about the time and you walk in to see an audience of unending empty benches. Still, unmoved, You assume you are in too early and steady things up, getting the mike near your mouth, setting the board and the lights to good visibility, to help every student gain knowledge, and then, suddenly, you wonder.......Is this a holiday? Am I in the wrong class?? A familiar face that often haunts in the dark, with unending questions, each question deserving another long break from teaching, finally walks in with a warm greet and a positive assurance that there are enough questions in stock to end the day in chains. Another fifteen minutes down the line and here you are, scared to death, that you might even forget what all you wanted to enlighten these kids with and slowly another trio walks in, one of them, still eyes closed, another with anti gravity hair, and the third, swinging his arms to eternity.Munching the end of your lip, you somehow wish that this nightmare end and lo and behold, a slender arm is raised among the masses..A student, requesting to be made holy with thy touch..In to the crowd, you run trying to ignore all the novels on the desks, even that new book that claimed to have found something about the da vince code that makes it sell...The question is asked and rings in the ears again before you can think of what was asked....WHATTT??? really??? How can they think like this? Are they in some french class??? Blah blah blah.........And out you run avoiding the nightare guy with your fastets pace when he intercepts you with another route and there goes the last blood of your life...
GoodNight professor

Another book on the rack

Getting a high is often mistaken as struggling for support and going beyond the humane reaches of the mind where we are alone forever.
In fact, one doesnt need alcohol for a high. or for that matter, nor any drugs or cigarretes.Just try jerking your head both sides and you will see that there is a deep sensation inside the head which is just like someone massaged the nerves of your brain. This is what any narcotic does. It massages your brain!!! Helps it function well....
Try puffing air out of your lungs for as long as you can, and then, there is a moment when you feel your lungs are exercised stretched out, that ..is a high for the lungs. When you run, more than you can, your legs swell out and feel wierd..They are hiGH..
Anyway, coming back to life's lows, midterms ended badly as expected though I was thinking of the unexpected.So, out we ran out of our lairs and headed north to a small city, the last one perhaps, before the desert counrty starts.
There was something in this place that mad(e) us go there....U-die-Poor
Yes, we died out of udapiur poorly, but certainly wisely and also satisfied.
Have you ever felt that you were part of a huge battle with a huge armour on you and with a spear in your hand, charging towards anything that moves?
This place, called the city palace has some really awsome stuff..The first thing that made me want to kill people was the wierd axe with blades glittering out of it in all posible directions. The second thing, ..Who doesnt want to own a fort like that?
All in all, the udapiur trip was never a let down, in fact, I believe we may have a sequel to it.

The land wants you to fight, Earning bread here was never a right. Everyone knew that there was an end, and at times, knew what that end was, but yet, they refused to give up, refused to give in. ready to give blood to the land, but never the land to a new blood, the legend of Maharana Pratap never fails to impress anyone. And then, the forts......
each a masterpiece, built to last forever, and then, the river Jaisamand(look up in some search), and the small fort on a hill above it.....You do not need to go to Udaipur to get a high...The fotos are dosage enough for a normal adult



Imagine a life where there is nothing that you like, A place where pain is what you get and pain is what you need. Each moment you suffer and you ask for more, No, this is no imitation, it comes from your core, Each injury, a pleasure, No mercy, no measure.Waiting for the last seizure, Here in the iron maiden....waiting for it to close, holding in the bloody hands a goddamn rose.....The moment is here, now this was the thing filled with fear, It came and it went, and still in the hand remained the rose, but the iron maiden clenched a tight pose.No amount of control helped it, it deserved the attraction it commanded, and thus his life, it ended.

Memories:Lonavla,Lohagad

Landslide at Lohagad


Nihar(black) and pratyush(windcheater) at Lohagad


























Pratyush and Me at the foggiest and most swampy place ever





















Nihar and Pratyush at the same place






















The mountain we climbed(Yeyyy!!!!)






















Pratyush and me

















Scary house near swamp with curtains!!

















Pratyush(on the pipes), Nihar(in left pipe) and me(three cheers for auto-timer)

give your precious skin all the special attention
it deserves with the new creamy soft bar from Lux.

Enriched with ultra caring Swiss Moisturizers,
the bar feels like dollops of cream in your hand.
Indulge yourself in its rich luxurious lather while
its unique curvaceous shape glides smoothly on
your skin making your skin feel thoroughly
massaged in the bath.

go and discover wonderfully smooth,
almost baby like skin which is so kissable

P.S.- link to my first assignment done after a long long time
http://rapidshare.de/files/4832488/Assignment-3_Id-200201242.doc.html
And, My favourite Flash Game
http://www.mousebreaker.com/games/bumperball/play.php
(Beat me, go to level 8)

wasnt switzerland famous for watches???
Anyway, I always like cakes and pastries to be creamy and soft , but my soap???
I think I should take a bite ocasionally.
No wonder I am so happy and content today,
after indulging myself in its rich luxurious lather,
I have no option left but to be fulfilled of any desire left.
And about its unique curvaceous shape,
it makes the soap jump off the hand every now and then.
Now that I have finally discovered kissable skin,
someone please come and test whther it is kissable or not......

Security Protocols

For an early bird like me, mornings are subject to be of the usual boredom unless blissful sleep or flying monkeys are seen. Today, unfortunately, I couldnt see either. so, with the only aim of spening time doing something unique, I hopped around the hostel to find a room with people still alive. Twas around 5 I guess, an so people were still up and an 'obscure' telugu movie called BABA was being screened.Every five minutes or so, there was some or the other action with things flying, getting blown, stuff being broken, all while the background rap was still going on..It went like this: B to the A to the B to the A...It's me, yo!! Baba.....All Iwanna be is Baba....B to the...
A few minutes later, Rajnikant was trying hard to groove his pelvic girdle while manisha Koirala(wonder how she agreed to sign the movie) was moving every organ(or rather, meat) of her body.Anyway, that was when I realized that I had kept an alarm to go off at 8:30, an it was already around 8:15..It was quite a simple thing to o..Either go back to the room an switch it off...or assume that the roomie guy does it ...Now, I do not count this one as a nut, but he certainly does have his share of problems with me around..So, finally I went back to switch it off at 8:27 just like in some ation packed hindi movie..An then, proceeded to unpack my stuff and stuff everything I found into the almirah...Tat was when I spotted the new suitcase I brought. it had a number lock and looked really cool..I wondered why i had never use this thing for security an immediately put the zip(of course, the zip of the case, u nutcase) inside the lock and tried fiddling around with the numbers..When I was finally satisfied with it's security, I realized that i never knew the code to open that piece of shit. Wonder what happens next..

My first Official holiday in the last 3 years

Ok!! so, the title says most of it...Here's the rest: I was never ready for the trip. Every moment that led me close to the bang bang time, I was more and more gettin dull and wanted to escape for the moment away from the bus and away from things that would make me spend money. Busy in shifting stuff to my new room , at about 7pm I finally decided that it would be a huge problem for the poor organisers if I dint show up coz it would mean another 1375 missing. So, I finally ran back to the campus, begged a tote bag and filled it with all the clothes I could find and ran toards the bus.

And Hey!! smoking just ouside the gate of the college, I felt really good...The guards were staring, but were all HELPless!!!!Yey...Anyway, The bus looked small and stuffed and in we went, and I found myself a cozy last seat near the window and settled my self down and off went the bus...
As we left the college behind, my disgust for the trip slowly died down...Something new was going to happen and something new always means something exciting..The journey seemed never ending, with people already dozing off..But, I found it rather interestin to look at all the buildings i had never seen, or never cared to watch, and check all the new roads..And enjoy the faint distant lights of small bonfires and wave at people smiling..

A quick check of what all I carried with me:
3 tees, two jeans, one of them used for about a week, and the other used everyday since a month while playin football or in the gym.3 books, a carl sagan,the fountain head,and the road to omaha...3 underwears and a brush.A pair of shoes that I threw in the bus coz I found no place for them in the bag. And BTw, of the 2 jeans, I was wearin one.

First Pitstop: the regular dhaba, I guess..At around 11 pm, our stomachs were growling and so, we stopped at this place near the highway about 140 kms away from that dreadful college and had some dinner. A CD of dungston checks in was followed by half a telugu movie and finally I lost interest in searchin for lights in the dark...Sleep hardly seemed like a necesity and so I lay there awaiting the destination...Come morning and the cool breeze was hitting like ice..the sweet smell of earth drenched by rain filled the nostrils and the eternal fear of the driver riding us through a cliff was dreadful.. But, the clouds, the fog, all those things , those fancy, sceneries somehow digitized or plastic sheets kept in those movies...Everything was just coming alive...It looked like everypart of a poster was dancing to life and was becoming real.....If anyone said, that 75% of the world, is water I never believed it till now...But here, There was as much water as there was land...If u saw land for a couple of minutes, hang on...There'll be huge lakes soon and water all over...Water from the sky, water flowing from mountains...There was water just about everywhere...
Breakfast time was when poha was made at some small hut in the mountains, just off the road, that was the time when a guy ran into the ladies toilet and shut himself in for an hour...Anyway, we were supposed to reach lonavla sometime in the morning, but it so happened that the route we took was a bit hard to drive on,(the ghat roads) and so, we ended up going @20kmph.
Lunch at a dhaba, was sheer ecstacy followed by a lassi!!slurp!!
lots of stuff yet to be written in.....

That dawn itself, we could feel the difference in the air, with the wind beeing mildly cold and smelling really fresh...Allday, we kept seeing water , water and more water...
finally, we managed to find ourselves in lonavla.Sleep and rest was the timetable for the day and so, out we ran tothe nearest wine shop, got some beer and a quarter vodka, and one economical dinner later, came straight back to the dorm to finish the bottle.

Come day2, the actual day of the trip, when we weere supposed to do something. we were dropped at this place called lohagad where land touches the sky through mountains or hills....And clouds keep hovering all around us as we keep climbing. We were sheduled to go see a fort and come bak before,...hmm..I think 1500 hours...The way up the hill was terribly winding and the wind and the cliff at the end of each wind didnt seem to be helping us poor travellers. we, took the lead by over 20 minutes overthe others and kept a fast pace so that we could seemore stuff than others, whatever it was in the fort....As we kept encountering people, we saw that every one in every group of people, wore some piee of rubber to protect himself from the rain..we were the only people going with normal clothes.....anyway, we kept walking and walking..an this in a loop ...And finally we reached a y-fork...with a tea shop at the jn. the guy directed us towarsd the fort and off we went, back on track.now, started the fort climbing....steps cut out off the hill, full of moss, and water literally flowing over them like you have some 2000 taps open just a floor above them.the stairs seemed never ending and so was our determination..At one wind, we decided to rest and I rested onthe stairs and just turned to my left to see if anyone behind us had made it to our position....and then, i realized....you do not see stairs from there...You cannot feel mother earth from that place...There's fog all beneath you and all around you...and between the fog,are small pieces of land..And with all these, comes, the eternal fear of heights..Anyway, we finally reached the top of the fort, unharmed and alive. so, we kept walking here and there to find a place to relieve ourselves when a guy choose a place about 2 metres away from an started peeing..I was wandering about looking at the sky when I could see a stream of yellow water flying towards me in the air...I ducked ,and escaped somehow....The rain became a bit more intensive and we could feel it. The water droplets were hellbent on putting us throw unlimite pain.Each drop was like a stone thrown by some one...someone up there sure is getting his saddistic pleasures satisfied.Anyway, I lost my way around the fort, and a lil'dog, took us back to the entrance of the fort, where we had kaandi..or pakoda.Off we ran down the stairs to find ourselves staring into the eyes of 4 monkeys.It took us about 15 minutes to collect enough courage to decide that we will somehow cross the monkeys without further assistance. So, down we went, still clean and clear...
and back to the y-jn, from which we were to go to the hmm....fort no.2.(help: wat was it's name plz??)
off we went, covering all the swamp, we coul find, "keechad" everywhere, till our shoes were covered with it. every ten minutes or so, we would find a water source to cleanse ourselves off all the dirt. and so, we kept venturing, till we came to a spot,at which there was a recent landslide...
and from the landslisce, we took the path that we found wider an cleaner.We kept walkin on an on in the swampy area till we reached a sharp turn where about a dozen monkeys screeched simaltaneously and scared the hell out of us.
We trotted back only to take a second try along with two different musketeers and reached the possible end of the path till where a mortal can walk. The swamp was too thick to walk.And there was a y-fork. the left one ended in a lake and the right one into a dark swamp with fog all over. A distinct sound could be heard. the sound of a bell ringing. a small bell....Later on, we were to realize that it was made by one of the buffalos there.And then, the ultra clean house...
we ran back to base camp to end the day somehow....
and when we came back to the foot of the hill, we realized this was not the end. Ther was this huge waterfall, huge enough to drench 15 people at a time, and we swarmed into it and the natural forces showed us their vigour...this is the smae thing that I drink at home and now, it was there, overpowering me, water, in it's basic, original state, and then it dawned that the water we see and we drink is no more natural than coke. water, that scares the shit out of you when you think of it, is real. water which makes you grasp and grope at anything soild nearby to protect you from falling is real. water is too huge, and its butchering by us, perhaps too small for it to reflect upon....Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, water

Eyes down, kid!!!

"I am three years older than you ..U bastard...What the fuck are you staring at??? wanna black eye?? or a punch straight at the solar plexus?? Do u really think you can get away with this ???Get the fuck away from my path....What the fuck do you think you are ,wearing that orange wierd piece of a tattered cloth???.... "
This is what i try to tell every fresher who gets anywhere near my way...
But, as Mr.Lenin(not the great socialist who brought about a revolution, but the warden) has other ideas for me, I end up moving out of the way and crawling away...
Anyway,
Have you ever wondered the importance of the way of interpreting anything that is written?
What is the effect of a left justified line on the user?? and that of a right justified one??

How would small look like place near big?? small big

something looks really wrong here..Why shouldnt the word small be a bit bigger than big??? Is it an implicit assumption that not only the objective that the word is intended for but also the means, the word itself, should be self-explanative. If so, then, what really is the necessity for me to use language?? anything small like a rat, can be written in real small font and an elephant in huge font...
Look at this one:
n a r r o w wide

Can you really read narrow and interpret pefectly at first glance?? Each time I look at narrow, again and again, it appears to me as n followed by the word arrow..Each space between letters is of the same length.But our mind still refuses to accept narrow to be really wide..though I wonder why wide can be not so wide. ..But narrow can never be wide...

have a look at small and big in the webdings font:
small small big big
now the only impression of big in this word is that huge block for the letter G in the word which makes it really look big...try finding words with G...huGe,Giant...Was G supposed to be the keyword for something big???

Now suppose I was in this farm in some small quiet village.The whole scene with a setting sun and me with a straw hat and a rake in one hand and looking at dry leaves will be
silence
And this does not look odd...But what if it was not silence, but SILENCE ??
It would look very weird describing something that is peaceful and quiet so boldly and loudly...

Now try this:
sex sex
the sex on the right is a lot more explicit than the sex on the left. See what I mean?? The brains is merely a spectator..It's the eyes and the scene that play the magic on us...
Anyway, to summarize, I wanted to say that a HOT female would help my brain develop a lot...Eye Candy please..My eyes are the only source for my brain to interpret and learn things...Get this in your heads ,faculty

and thinking of all these things.... can u imagine the context I am using 'pant' in, if I type pant ..

I still cannot make out the use of italics.But, at times, it has worked miracles... and of course, the exclamation mark is just to good for our brain to grasp a situation of just words and make a perfect scene that an author tries to convey.
. how about bark?? If I type bark!!!! it shows the barking of a crazy dog that amazes the writer while if I type BARK, this looks more familiar to a tree's main portion.

The Power of One

there are two hundred and forty people in my batch. More than, seventy of them maintain their GPA above three. In these seventy, I am familiar with more than 50 people. The other twenty or so people are the ones that I keep thinking about. I know what goes in the head of the people I know...What about the others???
For instance, I recently shifted into the on campus and one of those guys I mentioned in the anonymous 20, is my new roomate. He has his own computer, he has his own headphones and his own stuff. He can hardly resist sleep after 12 in the night.He hasnt uttered a single syllable to me till now.People who didnt see him talking might even think that he's one of those deaf and sumb guys. he has got a job. He studies well.He attends each and every lecture that takes place anywhere in the next square km. Be it his elective or not, he is bound to be there if there is a free slot. As I joined this college, I was a cute lil overgrown kid.But slowly, my mind adapted and learnt zillions of things, I never thought I could ever learn. But, yet, what remains abstract to me is the fact that no one, no one can ever think the same ....but , yet...everyone ends up doing the same thing and leaning on the same wall..
I do not dictate uniqueness as a quality of necessity, but a quality that exists, inside each head, no matter how dumb it looks or acts. Then, why do people do the same damn thing again???
I am no philosopher or some guy who wants to make something clear to everyone. After all my ramblings, I know I still remain groping in darkness here. But, what I see ist that, everyone has caught one light or another. Be it a small torch, that might work only for seconds, they are satisfied that they have light with them. This to me, reminds of moths. Whatever be the result of the encounter with fire, the moth shall never stop going towards it. Well..Why??? maybe it thinks that light is a safe place...But, then...we have a neocortex that makes us stay as human beings.
Here's the thing. How much ever anyone jeers or mocks me or stops me...And remains happy that he has a job and will remain happy...Just remember this:
There are billions of people who live in this world and most educated people do something or the other to get food,entertainment and sex. But, how many of them do we know?? How many of them have died and lived happy??
Everything that everyone puts is a mask. I know people...People interested in writing, reading, math, science, biology, mass commn. ...but because they are her..They need to continue here...
I have no idea of what it'll take to get what's inside my head...But I also know that it is better to try and faint than stay ignorant and happy...

Even now, I say that getting a job is not tough.I can call up someone and land my self somewhere or the other..But ..Is that it? A desk, a comp, a few papers and copying data?? The sole question of our existence marred by things that never yield happiness ...(oops!!!money does that)
I find it quite wondeful the way life existed a few hundred years ago. People did what pleased them. NO..Not in India..Say whatever you may, but India has never had an open head ...there were few people who could break out and excel..But, elsewhere, people who loved to dig, digged...people who loved to bould, builded(built, in fact) and people who loved to write, wrote(writed will suit the sentence, but will crack my hidden reputation for bad vocabulary) and people who...Wonder how I keep writing stuff just for the heck of it......
Anyway

Raj and the Art of Thinking

Carl Sagan is not someone I know....Some one just handed over a book written by him that taught me that life was more than just looking at notebooks , writing stuff and rewriting stuff to memorize it...NOw now!! People might wonder why I am writing this if Carl Sagan already propagated all this stuff...Well Well!1 He wasnt sure of all this and now!!!!

In spite of the fact, that I have done zero research and have zero experience in what he said, I am quite sure, that i might just become a multi-grillionare(a grillion is billions of millions of billioons of............) by what I just found out...
Have you ever thought of how Our Brain works?? how does it store and retrieve data?? how does it remember things and help us recollect??? Doesnt this seem exactly like a computer??? and how does a computer's har disk work?? A small needle keeps hovering all over the disc and retrieves data from the necessary place by stoppin over there...And the brain, is not any more complex than that..poor Sagan guy.. He couldnt think of this... We can start clipping electrice alligator clips all over the head...Bout hmm.....1,00,000 to be precise, and randomly start giving the person with that head of alligator clips, shocks of voltage good enuff to improve his memory....And one day..Ta daaa................All humans will come to Raj and stand in a Q to get their head treated with my proven and tested alligator electric clip method...

Everyone is invited to volunteer in my honest operation towards the development of the homo sapien civilization...Funding is always welcome and soon,....... read this carefully, may be you might be given the right to open a head improving Thinking branch of Raj's elite Head-Exponentiator technique....

Move over Carl Sagan, the $@v!0r 0f da worlD is Here........
And by the way, if you guys happen to be thinkin that I am totally crazy...remember, I wont help u exponentiate ur head capabilities...

And sooon, I am thinkin of releasin a beta version of this ultra modern head expo..thing
It 'll b in the shape of a hat and will hav thousands of circuits inside and t'will use solar power to generate shocks and u can use it in exams to remember stuff u canT remember normally..

The hourGlass

Every morning at around 8, gets up a disturbed soul and wanders aimlessly till lunch time..Post lunch, it is lab time and lab means browsing essentially...There is no room to change clothes..no room for myself..No Room...for a guy who needs a room...AAArggghhh!!! When will I get my own room in the hostel??
Anyway, Here's wat I av been thinkin of over the few days:
1. u r born
2. If u r a guy, parents save money for ur education
else
if u r a girl, parents save money for ur marriage
else
infanticide.
3. U r growing slowly..
4. U go to school and read about what gandhiji did for the country and what hitler did for nothing
5. U also are told of the great poets and their masterpieces when u cant make out shit!!
6. All these are meant to be subtle hints as to where our future lies...
7. Post-class 10th, school is done away with..Come Inter or 11th
8. If u have a life, take MPC or BPC..i.e. engineer or doctor..
9. done with ur 12th, go complete ur engineer's degree or go become a doc
10.Now that u r an engineer or a doctor, go find a job where the last 20 years of ur work is irrelevant and do it...And enjoy life
11. I am out of this...I need some expert guidance to get a great career...Any suggestions??
P.S- I dont hav a Pc and so I dont blog frequently..

Edit:
P.S- I dont hav a Pc Anymore and so I dont blog frequently..

Repeat...SOS...SOS

The severe shortage of movies expected to be good and the string of unknown movies releasing so frequently just couldnt stop me from seeing 2(do in hindi) movies I will never forget...
1. Maine Pyar kyon kiya
Scene 1,In comes Catrina in a lingerie and turns on the gas valves of her stove and then goes back to bed like nothing happened..camera goes through the wall to show the next door neighbour...An ultra modern house with heavy rap music in the background...and in between the rap comes another tune that I keep humming all day...Mohan Pyareee...ta ta taaa daa....Sab Ki maaare...ta ta taaaaa..Daaaaa.....Loop..Enter So-hail Khan, checking his armpits and then realising that it is not his fart that is smelling so bad...Next follows a balcony-to-balcony jump sequence followed by Sohail Khan's amazing break-a-window trick and then the switching off of gas...Sohail Khan then enters bedroom 1 and checks girl in lingerie..Girl in lingerie wants someone to hug her and Sohail Khan saves her life, eats an apple and goes back to sleep...

People might get just too involved in the first scene that they may forget that there is still some start cast leftover...Salm0n Khan, in this world with scant females, always gets hot chicks with bone problems and always ends up running away from them....Sush is his [b]HOT[/b](read bold) assistant and woah!!! Sagar is already asleep...Girl in lingerie calls Salm0n and Salmon throws his shirt off before going to some beach for the not-the-worst-song of the movie....Next when I am made to open my eyes forcibly with a loud hindi rap whenever Salmon appears.. Doctorrrrr Doctorr.....Dil ka Dooocturrrr.....(For people who cant find it catchy and rhymy, write to me I'll hum it and send it personally in a wav file).Next comes the "Coooooooooooooolest" song of the entire year...Just Chilll...Chill..Just chill...Wonder how I used to assume that good chicks can always make you continue living happily however bad your life is...But this movie has given me knowledge..One that you can get only by watching the entire movie..However, I wasnt entitled for Nirvana as some unknown force forced me off the hall even before the first half ended..go watch it and vote for it as the most informative movie and try to get it to the oscars please...
2. Dusssssssssss( ten in english)........Zayed Khan finds a bomb under a car..Camera Change...Abhishek Bachan finds Shilpa Shetty in trouble..Four people surrounding her with guns..Camera Change..Sanjay Dutt on roof top of same building..bachan wants to frag two and tells Dutt so..so that their frags are still high...But Dutt is better off with his jumping off the building and shooting with a pistol skills than Bachan with his Sniper skills..And bachan has to make do with a single frag..Zayed Khan tells bachan..There is no red wire here...In our training, we were taught to cut red wires....Innovative solution, 1.apply ...not ur head, but chewing gum all over the bomb and 2.cut any wire and ..Lo and behold..the bomb is diffused..
Code word-"Jeet"..used by half brother of osama to kill 20k innocent people in a football match between ...Close your eyes...India and Canada...
P.T.O for unravelling the Dus mystery

Unemployment And the Brave Indian Youth

The Brave Indian Youth sleeps at 12 o' clock sharp and wakes up early in the morning, has an early shower and then a long fitness procedure. goes back to sleep only to be awakened by strange voices and human warnings!!!
This has no CPI limits!!! Let's go and take this one!!!!
HP global soft.....The all renowned prestigious company is here folks...And it is here to take the tailenders..All those people who couldnt make it anywhere can find shelter here...So, get up and hang out ur umbrella!!!
Up is the India youth again at 12:40 IST pm, only to realize that the exam is at 1pm "SHARP"..and so, the Indian Youth uses his stealh power to find his way into an empty room and steal a pen, a pencil and then heads back to the LT for the exam.
The brave Indian Youth has no mood whatsoever to write for something he would never want to join in..But the great India Youth has to be sportive and so, the great Indian youth in all his glory, in a jazzy violet tee and a dead fade jeans, parades into the LT and picks a cozy place to move his hands for the next two hours...MOre than 250 lambs along with this brave Youth and still he remains calm , composed and too happy...


Till the first question is asked by a lanky guy, who was least interested in talking to people and most interested in lookin outside the door.....Does every one have his smart card?? 2 seconds gap..Message repeat...
Prof. Asim Banerjee is requested to carry on the no-ID card Q. And he requests people without an ID card to raise their hands.. Now that the Q was raised, I started to think about why I did not bring my ID card. My Id card is always in my wallet...And my wallet is always in my pant...But money is never in my wallet..And my wallet is never for any use...So, two days ago, I decided to stash my wallet in the almirah rather than carry it around like a dumb ass...And now!!! wanted to lift my hand!! Or rather, I was told or ordered to lift it..Now, u can always take a horse to water, but u can never make it drink or something like that..And so, I never lifted my hand and finally he declared that he recognized everyone and there was no need of any autherntication..
Tension no.2 aka Q. no.2: Does each guy here have atleast 58% ?? I thought there was no barrier and of course I dont,because when there are three courses on your head, then your head starts to function a bit slowly I guess....Only people above 58% are eligible..now, I do not want your job HePa..I am bored and GTa is hard..I thought exams in AC were fun and so I came down..But how could I put this across???I wanted to make a run for it..but ..but...there were people all around and so I looked at everyone with my natural foolish smile as though she was asking the most silliest question I ever heard....
Next comes banerjee boy and clarifies that there is no limit...And in comes an imaginary sense of elation...Yey!!!I am Qualified!!!!!!I am Qualified enough to attend an exam with no bars required...
two hours and lots of circle shading later, People are told to attach their cv with the answer sheet....Sheet.....SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!Dont these companies realize that everyone of us uploads there resumes for these guys to see at some webpage?? Why do we need to hand them out print outs?? Dont they realize deforestation is the primary cause of environmental pollution??? ANd dont they realize that pollution causes chokin and how about this....I am already choking..Yes!1 i forgot my cv....Now, even this thing is spared and then, we are made to wait for 3 long hours after which I am allowed to walk out gracefully out of the room as my name never appeared in any page!!!

Now, those 3 hours from the exam end to the results!!! I was tensed and waiting!!! waiting and hoping that I do not get selected!! I had no pair of formal shoes, clothing or files or any certificates for that matter......I was formerly formal!!!
And about the great iNDIAN youth......U just wait people....I'll mint my own money and this is not about sour or grapes or something!!!!I am happy in what I am ..And I can always make myself Happier ...So, :p to u

Job Ahoy!!!!!

Finally comes the evening of Sunday, the day MindTree(A weird name for a company that can work well...Maybe it's like the mind growing like the branches of a tree) sets foot on campus and gives a pleasant lecture to people about it's ever increasing requirements. One hundred and twenty....thats the number they wanted...Now every 3 pointer was so happy that people already started swimming in imaginary money. come the exam, I bet it was a piece of cake...none to complain, none to compliment(Well, I didnt write it, so it's just another guess)..Out come people, and soon, out come the results and guess what? Out of the 240 people that wrote, only 69 get selected for the interview procedure...---Time to realize the standard of our IIT ++ college folks..We never have been taught anything...Well, mostly...In comes a prof to a class, enjoys the attention he gets for an hour and out he goes, back to his cabin,to get some good old snooze time.. Anyway, all apart, I bet no one would have ever imagined 240 trim faces with neatly presed shirts and pants tagged along with formal shoes and a nervous look....And of course, curious glances at why I am still wearing my t-shirt and pyjamas(I need to explain it to every other guy that I am not eligible)
Oh..As I was saying, Everyone wants a job....Well, If i had a better GPA, maybe I too would have done the same...But essentially, is this the end of everything?? You are given a desktop and a desk and some thrash to dump properly and you just keep dumping????I bet this is why there are so many programmer guys in the world and so so many many companies ...
What is not obvious to me is does everyone just go....go for some job?? Arent there people who want to kep studying??Learning..?? Or people who want to make money all by themselves...

Anyway, All the rain has brought a billion mosquitos and I killed atleast 45 and Rahul has competed equally...
Joyous people, sad people, people like people, people unlike people, everyone will be out there now at the canteen telling about what was the problem with the panel they were interviewed by and why the panel is incompetent ....I ...can say only one thing..Go take off your pants and check if you still have your balls!!!!!

All my life I have cruised through without much work...This is where the cruising thingie stopped..It's a camel ride now..And I am almost falling off..But I am still riding folks...And If ever I get off, it'd rather be for golden shoes and not just hawaii slippers...

The 'D' factor

Now this is a totally new and emerging factor and has become one of the most famous syndromes at college..
More info: full name -d2 factor
scientific name - De wingio 1st floorio facterio
Caused due to the shift, not of any winds or rain, but of most people that are and speak telugu, this factor forces everyone that speaks telugu to stay together and bond like gel.It has caused the shift of six couples(pairs to be specific, that is people and their roomies) into the first floor of the D wing and now that means out of the meager 18 rooms that the wing has, 9 or more rooms are spammed with them.
I, personally, love talking to and living with these people. I have had great friends among them, but, somewhow, there is some other factor missing, which just throws me out of their circle and still leaves me a foreigner.....
May be I am not very friendly,may be I maintain my own space, whatever it be, I do not believe in all good friends staying together to make a huge happy family. There are others in the college...240 people in total to be specific..Arent the others good enough to be great friends???
what sin have all the north Indians commited that they too, along with me,stand outside the circle??
Me?? Yes!! I have got problems...I am too commanding, take everything for granted...But, I never hate my life..I still remember this huge fight that took place about two years ago, when around 30-40 people from A.P, went around wrestling some 'negative' people and beating life out of them. People were called for and recruited for this job...I did not turn up for it..I was never up to take up sides..I have always been a neutral watcher..or may be ..I hav already had enough violence in life...May be that's where the rift begins...Each day I see, that whenver I go along with 3-4 of these guys, they keep talking among themselves and I am the last questuoned to or answered to...Not that it matters a lot to me, if people swarm all around me and keep me high, but I believe in the democracy factor....Sharing equal warmth with everyone till you understand, that he/she is unlikely to be likeable.....
Oh...Oh...Arghhhhhhhh......
May be, I am hateable...Now, people who are hated do not realize that they are hated..Maybe I am cut off coz they never found me likeable...
Anyway, getting back to the D-factor, the D-factor is a constant source of high amplitude noise to all those people who do not understand telugu and a high source of entertainement to those who do..Accompanied by grouping up of everyone into a single room, and then reciting of some knowledge from some book, the D factor grows over most A.P. people and kills the ears of most non-AP guys..
The Un-D factor
Negelction of people from the D factor...caused by, well...I at this moment, have no reasons.
bUt, I can make up a few for sure,...
the Un-D factor is not about undies or underwears..
It is much more intense and related to the way you are welcomed into rooms..If everyone turns their head for a smile, you are in the D circle
If a few do that, then you might get in..
If no one bothers about u, U are now affected with the Undie virus...Prevention is better than cure..
more about the A.P guys from my college(remember that, though I am not in the D- factor, I still am one of them)
They play games.
They play football.
They eat together, which to me, is the best way to socialize.
Each one has his own life and no one talks about much about the girl he likes.
Most people dress similarly.
They are uterly brand conscious.
They hate glittery clothes and when I wear green or orange I am looked at thoroughly.
Some of them just keep going through life without having to do anything.
They take up an enormous time for the act of leg pulling.
Most of them cant be down right blunt.
Most of them have opened up from their buds here, in college.

i keep thinking, if I was the guy entering a room and I was also a guy, who was inside the room, a guy full of the d-factor, how would I see the old me??with a hi?? no.....I'd just be thinking...hey!!what the hell!! this @#$% is back... And there, the stupid old me, unware of evil intentions would shout "Hi be", and a nod followed by the new me, proposing to be understood to the old me that the new me is too busy and the old me just stares as someone else runs in, greetings follow and a long conversation too...

I need some drink.Have a nice Day.
Amen

Hair Everywhere

first came sea creatures and then evolved frogs and from, them, slowly, but steadily,and using either Darwin's or Spencer's theory of evolution, cells grew into many cells and many cells into organisms and these were apes.....
Apes were huge, scary and full of hair..they are very cheerful and hungry creatures(from what I saw in a zoo)..All of them look more or less the same and their heads too work the same way...
And then out of nowhere, stepped into the clean world, us homos(s for sapiens and not sex) .

And then, apparently the world changed and everything developed rapidly....And then, when apes changed into humans, (this is my theory of evolution), they must have run through a spot on earth with some beam, which converts them into smaller creatures by shrinking them and reduces their hair density and the beam affects their brain adversly giving them a lot of I.Q.

And now, comes the question I wanted to ask, if apes are humans with hair and without brains, ...shudnt humans be apes with brains and without hair???? Why do we still have scant hair everywhere and dense hair at the least required areas...????
I never understand why I need hair above my head...Does it, cool my head like the fan on a processor??? Does it hide something unknown to the world, that just lies above my head???

And what is the use of all those long stinky hairs in the armpits??? Is it to cushion ur shoulders if your arm slams onto your chest rapidly???Or is it like a mini sofa for the hand???

And what about all the hair all over the body...those small strands that are present everywhere....?they all look like grass waiting to be mowed...

And what about the hair all over the crotch?? For heaven's sake, we already are wearing underwear to hide the thingies ....whats the need for all that hair...?? and ever wondered how much it pains if those hairs get stuck between your undies???

Anyway, I wanted to introduce my own theory of world progression:::

Humans came first...They started eating all they could find...and screwed like doggies and multiplied themselves very soon....And as this went on, because they did no work, there had to be some way to lose all their energy they got by eating grass,...So, hair started growing on them..And slowly they turned into apes...And apes in turn fell into water because of their clumsy hands and turned into alligators which when rolled into sand or sea beds turned into fishes....Now, when any ape ate such a fish, it turned into an ape with spikes...(like a porcupine)....And soon, these porcuapes, turned due to the heat into all kinds of apeosaurs when too much heat and light cause all of the aposauruses to faint and turn back into plains apes..A few of them survived the blow ...but though they copulated with apes, they could not multiply....And thus, apes ruled the earth...But, soon, due to the heat and the dryness, the apes scratched themselves so much, that their whole body got sore.....
So, all apes tried using pantene pro v with extra vitamins for the hair and this turned them into bald but wiser apes.....And that is how humans came back to the planet.......

All I could see was endless darkness and there I was falling deeper and deeper without someone just above me, who kept on banging me with a hammer...I thought I needed to hold onto something to stay alive and started groping around and suddenly....thud, I was on my bed and outside the room, the gardener was making some weird sounds which made me have nightmares....
This afternoon, I was determined to get my fone repaired some or the other way and so I set off on my kinetic with PC at the back...I was really careful not to cross 60 and so glided smoothly but soon, I was back to my original angry driver form, shoutin mercilessly at everyone and making way out of nothing....
I love speedin over brdges and now there was a bridge in about a 100 meters and so I started my way up when I spotted a teenager type kid with a cycle in his hands looking the other way..I thought he was trying to find something he had lost or something and so kept going when suddenly he sped right perpendicular to me at a speed ....(as chacha chaudhary says...) faster than a computer...And He was all over us when we were a meter away from him.....This was when I remembered the game I have been busy with since the whole week GTA(grand theft auto San Andreas), I drove my unicorn(my kinetic with the left mirror broken in the last accient) to the extreme left avoiding him by a hair's width(or perhaps more appropriately my hair's length),whistling past him, now everything looked like it was all GTA GTA GTA...
Making way between two trucks.... Bike Skill++++
Taking vehicle to petrol pump walking....Stamina++
Braking just in front of a cycle...Insane stunt bonus+++ 500$, wonder when I'll get it
Anyway, coming back to real life ...
I saw a board which read Nokia in huge letters with the same shade of blue and so we tottered in and asked the guy whether this is the service center I was lookin for...
He said ,"yes, we repair fones here"
I inferred" this is the center"
real Inference:" This is con man 1"
So, I handed the fone to him which he immediately broke up into multiple parts and told me that my phone was soaked and the warranty will not cover it and that he will service the phone first to check if that will make it work..


And he told us to come back in 15 mins,...when we got back he told us that the washing of the phone and keeping back all parts will cost 150 rupees and told us that it was working now!!!!Checking it, I found it still read" Insert SIM card" and he says
" your SIM has a high voltage and so it's not working....., It is a hardware problem and it'll cost more ...come back after an hour"
One hour of Nothing later, He says..."It'll take time ..."
I said..."well, shouldnt it be covered under warranty?""
And he says" The service centre is across the road..."
Fuming over the guy we went down and to the service center...
And BTW,
In the middle of all this....we went to a pan shop while we were whiling time away, when PC was fascinated by all those pistol shaped lighters and I was eying cigars, when PC asked for a sweet pan and after gulping it down, he asked the shop guy, "fone ...fone..???"
Now, this was something weird...what happened? As I was wondering what to do, Pc said again" mera fone mera fone....neeche hogaa" when the shopkeeper retrieved his fone from behind a desk....When PC was gulpin his paan, the shop guy grabbed the fone and hid it in a second and now claimed that he was saving the fone from gettin stolen....
Anyway, finally we reached the service center, only to realize that that thing closes down at 6:00 pm and it was already 6:06 pm...
If bad luck ever stops kissing, I can give up my life for it :(

God hates Us(my feet)

Hi!!!! We are Lusus Naturae's feet!!! We are huge....Very huge compared to the normal average human feet!!!!We cannot fit ourselves into most footwear and so have our own range of footwear..We hate Raj and his hopeless addiction to football!!!! Every evening around 6, he uses us to hit around a huge globe, but more often ends up hitting other's feet or the ground!! We are hurt and swollen!!!
Last week, Raj was taking us and Arvind's feet too to sector 16 in Gandhinagar when we overheard Arvind talking about going fast as there were only 3 minutes left...Lusus sped up like there was no tomorrow and Wusssshhh!!!!!! Tank's empty...Now, Lusus balanced on us again and we were so angry that we decided that enuf was enuf!! we needed some rest in our lives...So we tore up one of our own clothing(slippers,for the layman) and so Lusus was stranded on the road whilst Arvind forced his feet to move the vehicle and get some petrol!!!
And now!! we have brand new hawaiin clothes(hawaii chappal, for the layman) worth 125 rupees..Next day when playing football, Lusus seemed extraordinarily fast and graceful!!!!And suddenly he ran us straight up a 2 centimetered thorn!!! After two hours of struggle, he finally did get it out!! But I bet this was his ay of revenge on us!! Lusus , we hate u....But, we are ready to change our stance if we get a good pair of female feet to gore!!!

hostelproxy.da-iict.org :3128

As I hold the end of my pyjamas to keep them from falling down, and walk as slowly as I can to prevent the rain water from splish-splashing on me, A sense of weakness overtakes me. This has been my favourite pyjama since about 3 years.. It has seen all the places in ahmedabad and gandhinagar and is now getting old!!! Soon it may tear out somewhere and that .......Boo hooo....

Transporter, not a very famous movie, I guess, I was watching that when my eyes were reluctant to see and ears, to hear...So, I slept in front of the monitor...And I never felt like I was sleeping...I went gliding into time and when I opened my eyes, I was the first guy to wake up in the summer internship Tejgadh, ChiChodh room!!!what a wonderful experience it was...
Just imagine, if time was just like distance...U could traverse back and forth as you want and this is something I copied straight from "slaughter house five"--A must read for people who have no other work and end up reading my blog!!!

Nothing much that I can talk about is going to happen these few days(till the job giving aka pig checking thing starts), so till then I have this master plan for hibernating away from the world of desire,fun,orkut and blog. But, before I start my regular bullshit again, I need to say just one thing...Life is the most precious thing ever..And enjoying and laughing away every moment is the aim of life....Holding up all your happiness for the future will never work...Who knows, till when one is going to stay in this place......Whenever I try to put this through to people, they are never ready to hear....Whatever power governs life is not kind, nor forgiving.....Live Life King Size....And Bharath, There must be some mistake somewhere......

The last post has been edited.Check.

Stop my Resume!!!!!!

It's the end of the third year and the sixth semester of engineering for most people in my batch and you can no longer see these kind of people at places other than the library and the lab or their coaching centres. No one has a moment to spare...everyone hellbent to deliver that extra bit of work to get that extra half mark to get through that college you could boast to your son about..
Here's a small conversation I accidentally overheard when trying to sleep in the library..
A:"Wordlist mein kaha tak hua??"
B:" Abhi to shuru kiya hai..."
A:"Sacch bol Ch....."
B:"Abe yaar....L tak ho gaya hai"
A:" !@#@!$%^&, tune toh phod phad ke rakh diya..."
---------------------end of conversation---------
Now, A tells me about his wordlist:"Abbe yaar..aur teen din tak lagega complete hone mein.."
(He must have reached around Z somewhere..already)

I must say, very clever..So, now, B is a bit behind A..i.e, A has a better chance now!!!And every one in my college is an A and there are few Bs I must say...

Anyway, that was not what I wanted to tell you all about...It's this HUNGAMA since the last three days about uploading resumes..For the less informed people, a resume is unlike what I thought,not executing something that has been suspended but, it is a summary of one's academic career...And people who want bonded labour find healthier pigs using this resume thing and a few other tests and interviews to finalize whether this pig will yield a lot of meat or not.
Ahh, Resume..Just before the resume fever started a site was up for this thing which showed the name and roll number of all students and to my extreme horror, to the extreme right was also written, their CPI.(grades). I closed my eyes and prayed that some one hack this site down or atleast put a black mark over my CPI section...But 1.6 out of 4 can never go hidden...
Oops!!! I am getting carried away by so much of academic action..Next started the time when you need to make and upload a resume..Normally, I always have my own words for each and every incident and thign, here's where I go speechless and let the resumes talk:
These are listed in the personal achievements column of the resumes of my batchmates

handled hospitality of guests of Synapse
(Does that mean he makes a great waiter??)

Selected amongst top 1% of 24,000 students in NET-2002 held for admission to DA-IICT, Gandhinagar.
(what about the other 240 students ...? did they come in through some back door??)

Member of Women’s Cell, DA-IICT
(I swear, I never knew that such a cell existed)

Got 32nd rank in Ramiah entrance examination
(Now, Ramaiah is an exam held for the coaching of IIT...Gettin 32 in it is quite an achievement...)

Awarded the `Best Student of the Month` award
(12 months a year, 10 years in school..For one month, if I did my homework well, I could have written another personal achievement in my own resume)

Selected in IIT-JEE 2002 Mains
(Do U realize that hundreds or thousands of people did that??BTW, me too)

Took part in many general knowledge competitions in school.
Active sportsperson in school.
Received many certificates of appreciation in school
(Now Now....Since when has participation become an achievement??)

Was member of the winning team of Treasure Hunt
(Some contest this was!!!!! The winners got coupons that were expired and I was part of the team too...I forgot it was to be written down in the achievements column)

Got prices in many GK competitions
(U got prices???????????OH MY God...I thought you get good prices at the nearby grocery store...)

Third Prize in aero-gamy (Paper aircraft flying competition) at Synapse
(A paper aircraft is a folded piece of paper..The one that travels most distance wins first and then follow the 1st and 2nd runners-up...I bet an amazing video of the amazing paper plane would be a lifelong achievement cum memory.)

Begged First position in the interschool science quiz
(I did not know you could beg in quizzes...If only I knew this before...I could have
begged certainly and shamelessly everywhere for prizes..)

Secured a Prize in an IQ Contest in IX
(Now, ....It is a personal achievement if you still remember that event ..right?)

More to come, No credits of this can be attributed to the author of this blog as this
was the result of a group discussion though the comments flow straight out of my heart.


Passed the Introduction to North Indian Classical Music optional elective in the 2nd semester.
(Ohh!!!!was such a course really there?????)

Received a third prize in writing a program to develop a Love Calculator in Calc Competition organized by the EHC group of DA-IICT
(Cannot comment)

Articles written for the college magazine ICTian
(---)


Secured certificates of Successful participation in 3rd National Science Olympiad, Young Mathematician Contest, Maths and Science Competition, NTSE.
(ROTF...participation certificates sure are a lifetime achievement for us losers)

Participated in extra- curricular activities.
(Very good!!Keep it Up)

Received certificates of merit since LKG to class 10th every year. • Love poetry. Won a prize for writing in school.


Dumb Sherrards competition
("Dumb Charades".....I thought I was the worst)

Babel

babel is a word, that sounds like a cross between baboon(huge ape,black and scary) and babool(toothpaste, white with the jingle 'babool babool, paise vasool') with e being an added culprit.
Babel, to people living on caffeine and the Baron's book and CAT books, is defined as confusion.
But, Babel is more than that.Apparently when Noah brought people in his ark, the race of human beings grew and exploded like anything.. and in these people, were some, who were, very, very clever...(like the author of this post) and these guys decided to make the biggest building ever to reach heaven...God, watchin from above, already upset that he gave this intelligence to people like me, decided this was the limit and so introduced the barrier of languauges...And then, people could not understand each other...there was confusion and chaos all around..And the building remained thus, unfinished...


Anyway, amongst all this confusion in the world, rises an undercover demi-god. Though he may look deceptively human and equally idiotic, his brain is faster than a supercomputer.He may be siting around with his friends chatting and listening to songs, but inside him, keeps running the huge calculation to find out the number of twists in the strand of a required DNA to form a human being from a ....hmmm..frog?
It may appear now that he typing on a keyboard, but in fact, he is now inside his head, creating a dupliporticator..which can either duplicate the creature placed inside it, or teleport it to any required location in this nebula or do both...that too in about 0.00000234 micro seconds..

After actually making such inventions, one may wonder why then, do they never get popularity and the creator money...But, what you need to know here is, that this intelligent genius has crossed all the limits of living and has no desire for lust, fame or money.He simply hides these in his -234th floor, underground...and will only use them for the good of this world...
And next in the line, is an automatic lighter, which lights cigarettes as soon as they are placed between the lips, a new hot drink, that comes with a High meter and you can adjust the high to whatever limit you want...
But, themost essetial thing yet to be invented by this extraordinary being is something that can help his keyboard skills!!!! :(

Being Human

Going into a room in the hostel near you and sitting behind one of your friends, without him knowing and leting it be like that for a long time is very hard..I was trying this yesterday.After about 3 minutes, I finally hit upon the idea of scratching his hair...And making him turn around..
Look at lizards.They can stick to the same point on the wall all day...Is that coz their brain doesnt tell them they are bored??
Anyway, sticking my head back into the area I want to, I now have the biggest problem ever ever in life.Whenver I type problem, "girl" follows suit.But this is different.I am stuck in my btech and have no idea of what to do next. NOt that I am bad at programming, but that ..to be good at it, I'll have to learn it.

Earlier when I was this over energetic teen with a will to know everything in the world, I never thought that someone could stop me from learning what I wanted. I never knew that education too like normal business, is business...And people, who grind others, and are ready to eat ass just stay forward.
Aaaargh.....No point in making my college friends laugh over my extraordinary academic skill...
What I was thinkin of was, how would it be, if I was born in america??
Right from my birth, each and every move of mine would be video taped and given back to me later to see..Soon, I would start bloating with Mc.D's. Or will I? No No...I wanna b a heartthrob..So, Lemme think , that I am still smart,slim,and 'Sexy'.And hey!! there are hundreds of girls in the college now !!yey!! and me, am a genius..people come to ask me questions, get them answered and make friends with me. I would be a permanent chain smoker, with billions of booze all around me and I would be up around the clock doing my research...Yes! research...But, on what? Most probably on why girls in U.S.A run back to their boy friends after getting Qs answered from me...Do I look evil? Do I look too innocent? Should I wear those tees which speak about virginity, dignity, opportunity??Or Do I look too sexy to be single?(I am allowed to write whatever I want in my blog, remember)...I would have ended up being a very great "single" or gay philosopher who showed a lot to the world which ridiculed him....

Coming back to my crazy thoughts, what would you do if suddenly you find out one day that your whole wardrobe is empty and you slept naked and have nothing to wear??? Now, I thought about this for a long long long time and concluded thus..The best way to cover oneself, after clothes is, to use buckets. Though we may find it very funny on T.V, try it once if you do not believe it..U r guaranteed to feel free,"from the inside"...And if u cant find buckets, multiple mugs plus some rope might just be another alternative....

What would some one like to do if he is sure that no one is going to come anywhere naer his place for one whole day??
Here's a list of what someone can do:
1. Try to reach the other corner of my room, walking or rather crawling like a snake.
2.Go naked and then do things like there's nothing new happening...

Anyway crazy thoughts and future apart, I am unable to imagine what to do here...Do I brush my teeth or do I enjoy the first rain? or do I go back to sleep?

Right or Left out?

When you complete what people have expected you to, you are good. Otherwise, you are bad...People always expect to hear the truth..Not a lie...

Now what is good...Truth, isnt it???
And what is bad, a lie..??
So, when you tell the truth, you throw light on something, isnt it?
And when you lie, you make it dark??
So, good aka truth is light
and bad aka lie is dark.
Now, light in any sense of art is normally white....
So, light is white...
=>truth is white and lie is dark..
Now ...Aint dark, a place that is pitch black??
=> truth is white and lie is black..
Now, till here most people will accept what I said..
But then, what is the diffeence between white and black?? they are just another two colors on the palatte.Why does one exude positivity and the other negativity?


But, whenever we picture angels, we put them in white clothes, white wings in a white background and this is a general thought and when we think of satan, he is always in black, with an evil grin.
Now, here's a small piece of handwaving
White is a bright color and black a dark color..And both are opposites.. It is essentially these properties that have made me choose them as the symbols for truth and false.
Now, check yellow and violet..Yellow is light and bright.....And violet, is it's opposite...
So, please believe people in yellow and stay away from people in violet........
OR can it also be like....if people have hair, their head is black,....dark?
and if they are bald, it's ...uhm..white? So, we need to believe the bald..

Shit apart, what I wanted to propose was that both the factors, truth and lie, be given the same worth. That is, just because, you have down something true, you should not be put on the top of the world. What we need to realize is when one lies, it is not as bad as you think it is. Heads and tails....One and the same....There is no ultimate truth, no ultimate lie....Truth exists because somone lies and vie versa..Both are one and the same..

P.S.: kindly do not use this against me..

Accessories--wat to wear and wat to bare

As far as what I have seen in bombay, if you are a girl, u need to

1. stand in front of the mirror atleast a dozen times before u finalize that you are as beautiful as yesterday night before sleeping.
2. Find the shortest and tightest piece of clothing found in the almirah and try to wear it. If not wearable,go back to 2.

For those wierdos in bombay whose muscles at the bisceps come to somewhere about the size of my waist, I bet they wear their sister's childhood dresses ot their girlfriend's tops, that are so tight that you can almost hear them ripping and so badly colored with tinges of yellow, orAnge,red,flourescent colors that your eye cannot see the thing for more than 1/10th of a millisecond.

The latest trend in my college:
3/4ths.The coolest thing to cover your crotch and your knees but still show your ankles to which those poor girls gore....?
Tight tees... Mummy might not think so, but I have great muscles and may be if I wear this tee from my 2nd class, girls will fall into a trance and start following me right where I want 'em to.



Next come the girls from south India for whom going to temple is much more important than my comp to me. They can never be seen without coconuts in their hands and holy vermillion on their foreheads. Theses girls have a set of salwar kameezes which look more or less the same and perhaps slightly differ in the shade{ like dark grey and light black}

And then, there is the I-am-Getting-Cool-soon type who have their hair braided but wear tight tees and have just started wearing jeans which have wierd dyes on them scaring you out of your nerves whenever you hit the canteen for some food.

And finally come the Angels, who may or may not wear something good, but they remain goddesses..that is, if they do not wear those jeans with vertical lines or military pants..


Among the guys, we see the
Pyjama variety: I fall into this category. too lazy to change after getting up,the pyjamas stick to me the whole day along with a borrowed tee from the nearest open room.
Shorts variety: now, this is a tricky class..this has studious people who wear long bermudas to ventilate their brain, then there is the shorts and shoes variety, the people who look like they are straight from outside the stairs of a temple, then the shorts and hawaii type, these people stand one step below me coz they take baths rarely when compard to my frequency, do not Comb Hair and hate changing clothes(underwear included)
I-am-Already-a-CEo variety: roam the streets wearing bolds and neatly pressed pants with each edge showing sharply with the shirt tucked in and a belt, everything in perfection.I suggest that you kindly try tugging their shirts, crumpling their pants. the reaction is one, worth seeing...


In the summer spring summer'05 special, we get to see girls roaming with a chunni around their neck which goes up and above the head like an automatic sensor, at the slightest prescence of the sun and which then goes 'stylsihly' between their hands like they are holding some vessel or something.Now this variety is an add-on and goes along with all classes of girls.

Ulta-Kwel-variety: Shave their heads or keep long hair, often wear tees with death metal bands with names so obscure that I believe such bands never existed( these tees are commonly sold on the streets of bombay for 35 rupees and I have one of'em), of course topped by a 3/4 th, undeniably they provide instantenous humour to the poor hungry people waiting for their meals.

I-love-studies-Add on: this is a bag, which goes along with most classes of people who either have a girlfriend or a good pointer.

I-brushed-today add on: This one's exclusively for me as often I feel really really hungry as soon as I get up, so I brush my teeth and keep the brush in my pocket and run off to lunch with the brush showing...

Classifieds

Needed:

"A very HOT female with a decent pair of assets and with a strong determination and ability to reach the top. It is also required that this hot female has a bit of brains enough to acknowledge the immense sense of humour hidden in me. Hot Females with Brains kindly oversee this advertisement. It is also required that a bit of emotion exist in the female.applicants please note that if a previous history or a string of relationships exist, than kindly avoid applying. Also, It is a strict rule that unlike the new and popular emerging trend of homosexualtiy, a heterosexually vigorously charged female is only welcome. Kindly apply at A202,DAIICT"

Now...Where do I put up this ad??? Outside the girl's hostel? Outside a ladies toilet?? Outside the nearest multiplex?? And how will I filter the applicants and select them? How come other guys get HOT females without advertising....Do I need to use some marketing skills??? Should I put up another ad saying " NO Problem, if U like staying NAKED".

As I hear and see everything, I can only say that I am entirely in a male world. Is this the end of my heterosexual road? My mom hates seeing me with girls. Wonder what people want.As I lay on my bed, every night I wonder, what if humans were unisexual?
That is, there was only one class(aka sex) and then there would be no more desperation and no more diversions..there would be no one standing in front of you hand in hand and leg between leg with their partner..... Unilke what most people think, life is short..really short, ...two more years down the line, my required organs might get rusted and wasted....seee...this ...is precisely the reason why a few people go around raping eligible females...they do not know how to put up ads and invite people...If only I was a T.V. star, it would ahve been a different story.. But then, can I avoid the stupid sting operation??? what if I was a writer? A young fiction writer with a strong philosophical background, like Salman rushdie?How about one of those photographers who shoot models "artistically"?? not a bad choice for a career...Earlier, as people told me, I thought perseverance was the answer...BUt now the answer is clear and is ringing in my head.. Beware HOT eligible females, if u happen to pass on a lonely road...Lusus naturae might be lurking around the corner. Kindly do not carry anything sharp, electric or/and dangerous...As I have but one life..And kindly use the keyword--"Scoot", if you are not willing to submit thyself to the great Lusus.
All Married,fat, females kindly excuse.
Other females, though, not too hot, too are invited for the offer and an occasional glow of care, affection,love and scant brain might just turn out to be the best combination.

My Duffel Bag--Attempt no.2

Plz note that the first time I wrote this post, the computer restarted at a time such that I hadnt writen the whole post, to feel sad and not re write it, but not so quickly that I din complete a page atleast...Keeping my fingers crossed and hoping this one gets posted.

The travel back home was my longest journey inside a bus ever and was certainly devoid of all the normal paranormal events I keep having. Of course, a few things can never stop happening,So.....

This cute lil'cat was purring and brushing against my feet. So, I patted it's head and kept patting it for a long time. What struck me real odd was that whatever the postion the cat was in, it's tail was always perpendicular to the horizon. Small purring cats.....A danger??...not much...So, curiosity got the better of me and I also was interested from a long time to make cats sway their tails left and right like dogs do when they are happy. So, I pushed it's tail a bit to the left, back to the original position and then to the right. After a few tries, I thought the pendulam affect would make the tail move automatically and Suddenly, it moved....All by itself. I was so happy that I wanted to gift the cat a biscuit but it already had plans for me.Pouncing on my hand, it bit my little finger and went behind a femme's feet.Though I wasnt hurt physically, looking at the *rare* heavenly femme petting the cat, hit me straight in my heart.

Anyway, once the rickety bus screeched out lifelessly I could not imagine it running again. Now, I realized why listening to parents is good...another 300 and I would have been going in a top class volvo with hot chicks all around.Getting aboard it, I had my first look at the ticket which said A.Now, what could A mean?? This bus was huge and surely had more than 26 seats so A cannot be the first seat.. My bright brain also told me that A perhaps meant an A class seat for A class people, or in my words, A WINDOW seat.. Dashing to the most comfortable one I could find, I pushed in all my luggage in thos little compartments above the head and waved at my parents.

Now, my father has s lot of affection for me, but he normally does not wave his hand so vigourosly.For a moment, I thought even I should do that ....But then , I realized he wasnt waving me gud bye...He wanted to tell me something..So, I went out and asked him and he fired" Why are you sitting there?"
I said coolly" A seat, the seat with the window"
He told me to ask the conductor once and confirm. So I asked him whether an A seat meant an A class once or not. He looked at me and asked" first time train chohd ke bus chad rahe ho kya?" is bus mein class nahi hote...A B C D are the first four seats and next come 1,2,3,.....
Well...whatever..So, I shifted back to the first seat to notice "Latest Hot girl" in the next seat...As the bus rattled it's way through an empty road, I wondered whther it was the wind pushing the bus or was there really something behind the hood that kept gulping fuel like water. Now, suppose you are offered a free ice cream...The flavour you like..But the one who has offered it to you is not a great aquaintance.. The sort of the situation where you think twice before accepting..Now, kindly do not make assumptions that go like Wat must the chick have offered him? or vice- versa..It was pure eye candy and atleast once a minute, just like an android, my head automatically turned 90 degrees to the right, then had a glance from the top to the bottom and then kept turnin as though exercising my neck.

The next halt we got down at was for dinner at around 11:30 pm and I wasnt up for any food. So, I settled on a half-broken roadside bench and smoked after a long long time. Then,I tried to recall all the tips my parents gave me right from the morning repeating every one hour. One of them was, keep emptying your kidneys as soon as you get a chance. So, I dashed to the toilet. Now, there were two signs outside this one, the above one said men and the below one women..There was one door which was around 3 metres inside and one door right near the board. I thought the higher sign should go for the nearest, but then ...very luckily I decided to go nearer and check both.the far away door was the guys toilet and cleaning myself, I got back to my bench place to find out the LHG(latest Hot Girl) was sitting there. I said to myself, here's another chance ...dun screw up
Walking up to her, I asked whther I could sit on the bench and guess what...I din get slapped, nor did I get a cold "take the middle one look".It was a nice friendly smile which said in the voice of a fairy, "kyon nahin?"

thinking about it, now I must say kyon nahin..Everyone has the right to sit naa...But anyway, tht was a good way to start along a conversation starting from my heroic past and ending up with the worst thing I could ever think of.
"The guy sitting in the next seat is my husband"
Next, My cell fone has stopped working now and I havent yet called out my parents..
And more importantly, I have had an "eventful" 1 day trip to Abu..And I really want to tell ya all about it specially about Purna Chand "Darshan", the guy born with a twisted brain.
P.S.
About the heading, I hate air bags and all the other suitcases and other kinds of things, so I bought this cloth made bag,a long time ago that looks like a sack and stuffed all my clothes into it. My mother has a long time hate and hate relationship with this bag and so warned me that if I brought back the bag next time, I would have to leave without it. Not heeding to anyone's voice me and my love, my bag, have completed the journey ...