It's the end of the third year and the sixth semester of engineering for most people in my batch and you can no longer see these kind of people at places other than the library and the lab or their coaching centres. No one has a moment to spare...everyone hellbent to deliver that extra bit of work to get that extra half mark to get through that college you could boast to your son about..
Here's a small conversation I accidentally overheard when trying to sleep in the library..
A:"Wordlist mein kaha tak hua??"
B:" Abhi to shuru kiya hai..."
A:"Sacch bol Ch....."
B:"Abe yaar....L tak ho gaya hai"
A:" !@#@!$%^&, tune toh phod phad ke rakh diya..."
---------------------end of conversation---------
Now, A tells me about his wordlist:"Abbe yaar..aur teen din tak lagega complete hone mein.."
(He must have reached around Z somewhere..already)
I must say, very clever..So, now, B is a bit behind A..i.e, A has a better chance now!!!And every one in my college is an A and there are few Bs I must say...
Anyway, that was not what I wanted to tell you all about...It's this HUNGAMA since the last three days about uploading resumes..For the less informed people, a resume is unlike what I thought,not executing something that has been suspended but, it is a summary of one's academic career...And people who want bonded labour find healthier pigs using this resume thing and a few other tests and interviews to finalize whether this pig will yield a lot of meat or not.
Ahh, Resume..Just before the resume fever started a site was up for this thing which showed the name and roll number of all students and to my extreme horror, to the extreme right was also written, their CPI.(grades). I closed my eyes and prayed that some one hack this site down or atleast put a black mark over my CPI section...But 1.6 out of 4 can never go hidden...
Oops!!! I am getting carried away by so much of academic action..Next started the time when you need to make and upload a resume..Normally, I always have my own words for each and every incident and thign, here's where I go speechless and let the resumes talk:
These are listed in the personal achievements column of the resumes of my batchmates
handled hospitality of guests of Synapse
(Does that mean he makes a great waiter??)
Selected amongst top 1% of 24,000 students in NET-2002 held for admission to DA-IICT, Gandhinagar.
(what about the other 240 students ...? did they come in through some back door??)
Member of Women’s Cell, DA-IICT
(I swear, I never knew that such a cell existed)
Got 32nd rank in Ramiah entrance examination
(Now, Ramaiah is an exam held for the coaching of IIT...Gettin 32 in it is quite an achievement...)
Awarded the `Best Student of the Month` award
(12 months a year, 10 years in school..For one month, if I did my homework well, I could have written another personal achievement in my own resume)
Selected in IIT-JEE 2002 Mains
(Do U realize that hundreds or thousands of people did that??BTW, me too)
Took part in many general knowledge competitions in school.
Active sportsperson in school.
Received many certificates of appreciation in school
(Now Now....Since when has participation become an achievement??)
Was member of the winning team of Treasure Hunt
(Some contest this was!!!!! The winners got coupons that were expired and I was part of the team too...I forgot it was to be written down in the achievements column)
Got prices in many GK competitions
(U got prices???????????OH MY God...I thought you get good prices at the nearby grocery store...)
Third Prize in aero-gamy (Paper aircraft flying competition) at Synapse
(A paper aircraft is a folded piece of paper..The one that travels most distance wins first and then follow the 1st and 2nd runners-up...I bet an amazing video of the amazing paper plane would be a lifelong achievement cum memory.)
Begged First position in the interschool science quiz
(I did not know you could beg in quizzes...If only I knew this before...I could have
begged certainly and shamelessly everywhere for prizes..)
Secured a Prize in an IQ Contest in IX
(Now, ....It is a personal achievement if you still remember that event ..right?)
More to come, No credits of this can be attributed to the author of this blog as this
was the result of a group discussion though the comments flow straight out of my heart.
Passed the Introduction to North Indian Classical Music optional elective in the 2nd semester.
(Ohh!!!!was such a course really there?????)
Received a third prize in writing a program to develop a Love Calculator in Calc Competition organized by the EHC group of DA-IICT
(Cannot comment)
Articles written for the college magazine ICTian
(---)
Secured certificates of Successful participation in 3rd National Science Olympiad, Young Mathematician Contest, Maths and Science Competition, NTSE.
(ROTF...participation certificates sure are a lifetime achievement for us losers)
Participated in extra- curricular activities.
(Very good!!Keep it Up)
Received certificates of merit since LKG to class 10th every year. • Love poetry. Won a prize for writing in school.
Dumb Sherrards competition
("Dumb Charades".....I thought I was the worst)
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Friday, June 24, 2005
Babel
babel is a word, that sounds like a cross between baboon(huge ape,black and scary) and babool(toothpaste, white with the jingle 'babool babool, paise vasool') with e being an added culprit.
Babel, to people living on caffeine and the Baron's book and CAT books, is defined as confusion.
But, Babel is more than that.Apparently when Noah brought people in his ark, the race of human beings grew and exploded like anything.. and in these people, were some, who were, very, very clever...(like the author of this post) and these guys decided to make the biggest building ever to reach heaven...God, watchin from above, already upset that he gave this intelligence to people like me, decided this was the limit and so introduced the barrier of languauges...And then, people could not understand each other...there was confusion and chaos all around..And the building remained thus, unfinished...
Anyway, amongst all this confusion in the world, rises an undercover demi-god. Though he may look deceptively human and equally idiotic, his brain is faster than a supercomputer.He may be siting around with his friends chatting and listening to songs, but inside him, keeps running the huge calculation to find out the number of twists in the strand of a required DNA to form a human being from a ....hmmm..frog?
It may appear now that he typing on a keyboard, but in fact, he is now inside his head, creating a dupliporticator..which can either duplicate the creature placed inside it, or teleport it to any required location in this nebula or do both...that too in about 0.00000234 micro seconds..
After actually making such inventions, one may wonder why then, do they never get popularity and the creator money...But, what you need to know here is, that this intelligent genius has crossed all the limits of living and has no desire for lust, fame or money.He simply hides these in his -234th floor, underground...and will only use them for the good of this world...
And next in the line, is an automatic lighter, which lights cigarettes as soon as they are placed between the lips, a new hot drink, that comes with a High meter and you can adjust the high to whatever limit you want...
But, themost essetial thing yet to be invented by this extraordinary being is something that can help his keyboard skills!!!! :(
Babel, to people living on caffeine and the Baron's book and CAT books, is defined as confusion.
But, Babel is more than that.Apparently when Noah brought people in his ark, the race of human beings grew and exploded like anything.. and in these people, were some, who were, very, very clever...(like the author of this post) and these guys decided to make the biggest building ever to reach heaven...God, watchin from above, already upset that he gave this intelligence to people like me, decided this was the limit and so introduced the barrier of languauges...And then, people could not understand each other...there was confusion and chaos all around..And the building remained thus, unfinished...
Anyway, amongst all this confusion in the world, rises an undercover demi-god. Though he may look deceptively human and equally idiotic, his brain is faster than a supercomputer.He may be siting around with his friends chatting and listening to songs, but inside him, keeps running the huge calculation to find out the number of twists in the strand of a required DNA to form a human being from a ....hmmm..frog?
It may appear now that he typing on a keyboard, but in fact, he is now inside his head, creating a dupliporticator..which can either duplicate the creature placed inside it, or teleport it to any required location in this nebula or do both...that too in about 0.00000234 micro seconds..
After actually making such inventions, one may wonder why then, do they never get popularity and the creator money...But, what you need to know here is, that this intelligent genius has crossed all the limits of living and has no desire for lust, fame or money.He simply hides these in his -234th floor, underground...and will only use them for the good of this world...
And next in the line, is an automatic lighter, which lights cigarettes as soon as they are placed between the lips, a new hot drink, that comes with a High meter and you can adjust the high to whatever limit you want...
But, themost essetial thing yet to be invented by this extraordinary being is something that can help his keyboard skills!!!! :(
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Being Human
Going into a room in the hostel near you and sitting behind one of your friends, without him knowing and leting it be like that for a long time is very hard..I was trying this yesterday.After about 3 minutes, I finally hit upon the idea of scratching his hair...And making him turn around..
Look at lizards.They can stick to the same point on the wall all day...Is that coz their brain doesnt tell them they are bored??
Anyway, sticking my head back into the area I want to, I now have the biggest problem ever ever in life.Whenver I type problem, "girl" follows suit.But this is different.I am stuck in my btech and have no idea of what to do next. NOt that I am bad at programming, but that ..to be good at it, I'll have to learn it.
Earlier when I was this over energetic teen with a will to know everything in the world, I never thought that someone could stop me from learning what I wanted. I never knew that education too like normal business, is business...And people, who grind others, and are ready to eat ass just stay forward.
Aaaargh.....No point in making my college friends laugh over my extraordinary academic skill...
What I was thinkin of was, how would it be, if I was born in america??
Right from my birth, each and every move of mine would be video taped and given back to me later to see..Soon, I would start bloating with Mc.D's. Or will I? No No...I wanna b a heartthrob..So, Lemme think , that I am still smart,slim,and 'Sexy'.And hey!! there are hundreds of girls in the college now !!yey!! and me, am a genius..people come to ask me questions, get them answered and make friends with me. I would be a permanent chain smoker, with billions of booze all around me and I would be up around the clock doing my research...Yes! research...But, on what? Most probably on why girls in U.S.A run back to their boy friends after getting Qs answered from me...Do I look evil? Do I look too innocent? Should I wear those tees which speak about virginity, dignity, opportunity??Or Do I look too sexy to be single?(I am allowed to write whatever I want in my blog, remember)...I would have ended up being a very great "single" or gay philosopher who showed a lot to the world which ridiculed him....
Coming back to my crazy thoughts, what would you do if suddenly you find out one day that your whole wardrobe is empty and you slept naked and have nothing to wear??? Now, I thought about this for a long long long time and concluded thus..The best way to cover oneself, after clothes is, to use buckets. Though we may find it very funny on T.V, try it once if you do not believe it..U r guaranteed to feel free,"from the inside"...And if u cant find buckets, multiple mugs plus some rope might just be another alternative....
What would some one like to do if he is sure that no one is going to come anywhere naer his place for one whole day??
Here's a list of what someone can do:
1. Try to reach the other corner of my room, walking or rather crawling like a snake.
2.Go naked and then do things like there's nothing new happening...
Anyway crazy thoughts and future apart, I am unable to imagine what to do here...Do I brush my teeth or do I enjoy the first rain? or do I go back to sleep?
Look at lizards.They can stick to the same point on the wall all day...Is that coz their brain doesnt tell them they are bored??
Anyway, sticking my head back into the area I want to, I now have the biggest problem ever ever in life.Whenver I type problem, "girl" follows suit.But this is different.I am stuck in my btech and have no idea of what to do next. NOt that I am bad at programming, but that ..to be good at it, I'll have to learn it.
Earlier when I was this over energetic teen with a will to know everything in the world, I never thought that someone could stop me from learning what I wanted. I never knew that education too like normal business, is business...And people, who grind others, and are ready to eat ass just stay forward.
Aaaargh.....No point in making my college friends laugh over my extraordinary academic skill...
What I was thinkin of was, how would it be, if I was born in america??
Right from my birth, each and every move of mine would be video taped and given back to me later to see..Soon, I would start bloating with Mc.D's. Or will I? No No...I wanna b a heartthrob..So, Lemme think , that I am still smart,slim,and 'Sexy'.And hey!! there are hundreds of girls in the college now !!yey!! and me, am a genius..people come to ask me questions, get them answered and make friends with me. I would be a permanent chain smoker, with billions of booze all around me and I would be up around the clock doing my research...Yes! research...But, on what? Most probably on why girls in U.S.A run back to their boy friends after getting Qs answered from me...Do I look evil? Do I look too innocent? Should I wear those tees which speak about virginity, dignity, opportunity??Or Do I look too sexy to be single?(I am allowed to write whatever I want in my blog, remember)...I would have ended up being a very great "single" or gay philosopher who showed a lot to the world which ridiculed him....
Coming back to my crazy thoughts, what would you do if suddenly you find out one day that your whole wardrobe is empty and you slept naked and have nothing to wear??? Now, I thought about this for a long long long time and concluded thus..The best way to cover oneself, after clothes is, to use buckets. Though we may find it very funny on T.V, try it once if you do not believe it..U r guaranteed to feel free,"from the inside"...And if u cant find buckets, multiple mugs plus some rope might just be another alternative....
What would some one like to do if he is sure that no one is going to come anywhere naer his place for one whole day??
Here's a list of what someone can do:
1. Try to reach the other corner of my room, walking or rather crawling like a snake.
2.Go naked and then do things like there's nothing new happening...
Anyway crazy thoughts and future apart, I am unable to imagine what to do here...Do I brush my teeth or do I enjoy the first rain? or do I go back to sleep?
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